How are ya? It’s been a really lovely weekend for me. Yes, I’m adding Monday and Tuesday to my weekend days though there was work on Monday for me. I saw movies on Friday (yep movieS-two of them (MIB3-total let-down and Dark Shadows-ok) to wait out the traffic. I went with a friend for his friend’s event and then another friend of his proceeded to pull my cheek as soon as we were introduced. I was livid but tried hard to contain and mask my irritation. Who does that? How can you be pulling someone’s cheeks? I’m genuinely confused. I understand that Children’s Day was just around the corner but odindin 5 9″ frame mi, getting cheek-pulled by a total stranger?! I didn’t like that one bit. I do know that I have cute come-pull-me cheeks but I’d appreciate a little bit of self restraint when we meet. Cheers *eyelashes*.
Ok, now to today’s post. I read this absolutely interesting post about a girl who had done absolutely all to get a man. I mean, she’d gone from church to church, attended events, started watching football, played manly games, all in a bid to pull a guy, all to no avail. Finally, she meets her dream man who was all the while, her next door neighbour! Her reaction when he proposed was totally hilarious. Read the story here: http://elizabethmartins.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/mr-anonymous/
Now, I have met a number of girls who do not miss any event. They always have this ‘this could be the day’ mindset and make sure they attend everything they get invited to, sometimes, even inviting themselves. They turn out looking dressed to murder. Short dress-check; sky high heels-check; hair-check; nails-check; bag-check. They are not hard to miss, according to my brother. You see them prancing around during the event, phone in hand, just in case ‘he bumps into her and they need to exchange pins’. They are and look desperate and desperate people make mistakes.
Desperate people are easy prey because desperation gives off a certain odour that is easily recognisable by a predator. I, honestly, do not see what the rush is about. It’s not about how quickly you marry but what you make of your marriage really. So instead of trying so hard to meet a guy why not spend time building yourself? You see 25 year olds who are not sure which direction their careers are heading worrying about when they’ll marry or why the guy they are dating has failed to propose. We forget: even after saying your vows, whatever problems you left unattended will still be there waiting for you when you get home. Only difference is they might have multiplied.
Now that’s not to say going out with the intention of meeting people is bad o no, but I think the emphasis, especially as a lady, should not be so much on looking like honey but being honey (if you get what I mean). On a random note though, how do people “meet people” in random short-term places like weddings, events, etc? I just don’t get. To the best of my memory’s limit, I have never met any guy that way. I would never give you my number, I would probably not even leave my seat to mingle so unless by Cupid’s doing, we are seated right beside each other, no chance! Anyways, different people have their area of gifting. Mine is certainly not mingling and mixing with new crowd. I just (usually) do not.
I think in the process of waiting, try and genuinely have a great time. Read books that build you up, read books on marriages, read books on people’s stories in marriage (the good, the bad and the ugly), read up on domestic violence and how some women AND men failed to see or accept the signs that they were about to fall into the hands of an abuser. Pray hard. Fast. Listen to your parents. They know more and love you enough to ensure you do not go astray. When you do meet someone (’cause you will…eventually), don’t go idolising him or her. Be nice, be good. Don’t make them pay for your ex’s crimes and wrongdoings but by all means, DO NOT act like you’ve just met Mr. or Miss The One so much that you forget to keep watching and praying.
If it works out and you do get married, keep watching and praying and being the best spouse you can be. If it doesn’t work out and he cheats, breaks up with you, starts dating your best friend, let it go and move on. Don’t act like your life is over, ’cause it really is not. God just helped you dodge a bullet. Think back on the relationship and do some self-analysis. Where you went wrong, learn and determine not to go that route again and for the things that went wrong due to no fault of yours, dust it off and let it go. Don’t slag off your ex. It gets so tempting to. Sometimes you will. But try and make a conscious effort not to. Remember, YOU chose him/her.
Paul urges us to be content in any circumstance we are in (Philippians 4:11). This cannot be done except by the power of God at work in our lives. In our natural, carnal state, we are simply not capable of having peace and serenity when things in our life seem so uncertain. However, through Christ, we are able to have peace, the type that defies understanding. Isaiah 49:23 says “They shall not be ashamed who wait for me.” I believe this means that although our patience on the Lord’s timing may seem foolish to those around us, and even to ourselves at times, God has assured us that we will not be put to shame by waiting on Him. What a relief! His Word also tells that those who “wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles.” (Isaiah 40:31).
Like my older married friends would say, enjoy your singleness, serve God as much possible, do stuff, go to the beach with friends, have as much alone time as you can get because a time is coming when all these might become luxury.
You that would usually have just yourself to worry about now have to add on a husband and child. Back in school, you eat when you want and when you are feeling lazy, it’s Indomie or you sleep like that, now you cannot, you have to get up and sort something out. You can’t expect your brothers and parents to sort stuff out for you anymore, you’ll be a full fledged adult *goosebumps*.
So inasmuch as marriage does have its really amazing sides which I TERRIBLY look forward to, I’ve made up my mind to absolutely enjoy my days as Miss Temiville and I strongly advise that all other single ladies AND gentlemen too join me in this resolve. And that my, beautiful people, is the end of my rant. I have much more to say, but I shall save it for another day.
Have a lovely week ahead (what’s left of it).